Tag Archive | husband

Don’t Mean to Burst Your Bubble.

I love it when someone’s stupidity provides you with the perfect blogging moment.

Unfortunately that someone has been my husband far too much lately.  Sorry honey I really love you and this isn’t supposed to be a husband bashing blog but really…you open the door, you walk in!

The week-end is here once again and like always we are trying to balance the multitude of tasks that need to be done in the household.  Final decisions needed to be made last night about whether or not we could make it to Canada for the week-end to put the docks in the lake.  The problem is we had already planned a dinner party for Sunday.  When my husband suggested that we could make it up to the lake it was my assumption he had cancelled the dinner party.

Hubby’s Week-end Plan:

  • Friday 1:00 pm – leave for the lake
  • Friday 7:00 pm – arrive at the lake
  • Saturday – put the docks in the lake and visit with relatives
  • Sunday 9:00am – leave the lake
  • Sunday 3:00 pm – arrive home
  • Sunday 4:00pm – host a dinner party

Hello???  I don’t mean to burst your bubble but I really am not super woman.

I’m not super man

Question: when will we get the groceries?

Answer: you can do that Friday morning before we leave.

Question:  When will I clean the house?

Answer:  The house is fine, just whip through with the vacuum when we get home.

Question:  When will we cook?

Answer:  I’ll just through the meat on the grill.

Question: What about the rest of the meal?

Answer:  That won’t take you long, you can do it.

No really I can’t do it!  But thank-you for the perfect blog!

Guess what I’m doing this week-end…staying home, cleaning and cooking.  Then relaxing with a wonderful dinner party.

He’s From Somewhere Further Than Mars

Mars is much to close to Venus for my husband to be from there.  He is from an entirely different Galaxy.

By Raven Vasquez

I happened to remind him that it was mothers day this weekend and kindly inquired if we had any “special” plans for the weekend.  Wow did he come up with some great ones!

  • It’s supposed to be nice we could work in the yard.  You could put the flowers in the side garden if you want”  Oh ya that’s just what I want, to bust my a** in the garden for Mother’s Day.
  • While you’re at the grocery store why don’t you pick up some steaks I can grill.”  Obviously we are not going out for dinner.  Grilling steaks is code for “I’ll sit on the deck with the dog doing a Sudoku puzzle while you cut up the vegetables, make the salad, boil the potatoes and clean up the mess.”
  • Did the kids want to have any friends over this week-end?”  Perfect not only can I look after my kids but I can have the neighborhood kids too so their mom’s can have a quiet relaxing day reading a book.

This was not going in the direction I had hoped so I thought maybe I should help him along.

  • What do you think about picking up a patio set this weekend for the deck?”  His response: “I don’t need one, what we have is good enough.”  When did I mention him in that statement.  It was me I was thinking of and no I don’t NEED it either. However,  it would be nice to have a table so I didn’t have to eat of my lap all the time.

This is when I realized that my husband is an Alien from another galaxy.  He just doesn’t understand women.  (But I love him just the same)

I love him anyway

Please make me jealous and tell me what wonderful surprises your family has in store for you this weekend.  Perhaps I can live vicariously through you!

He Just Doesn’t Get It

You’ve got to be kidding me…we aren’t spring chickens anymore.

thank you freestock

That is the thought that kept going through my mind as my husband went over the detailed instructions with me, yet once again, for my meeting with the landscaper tonight.

  “Here are the drawings of what we are looking at getting done.  Don’t forget that we want to get all the drainage from the house taken care of so we don’t have to worry about water …blah, blah, blah…. (that’s what I heard).  Remind him that what we are looking for is someone who can come in with the big equipment to just do the heavy work.  We can do the lighter stuff ourselves to keep within budget.  We can build the retaining walls ourselves….” 

photo by grendelkhan

What?????  Stop right there.  Did he just say the retaining walls are the “light” part of the job.  Have you seen the size of those blocks?  They don’t look light to me.  Perhaps I need to remind him of the heart attack I thought I was going to have from planting the bushes in the front garden.  Did he forget that I could barely make it up the stairs for three days after attempting to “work out” my legs last week?  He just doesn’t get it…we aren’t young anymore and these “little jobs” have become much bigger.

It doesn’t stop there, it only gets better:

“…and the patio area here is interlocking brick.   Have him price it out for just laying the foundation for it we can lay the bricks ourselves”

Sure we can… and did you see that pig fly?

Thank you oddsock

So my friends I am off to the landscaping store to pick out the bricks for the patio and the retaining walls that my husband and I are apparently going to use in the backyard after the professionals do the “heavy work” of grading it.  Please stay tuned, this should be interesting!  Future blogs will either be about a divorce or the aches and pains of my poor body.

(I suppose I should be thrilled that he thinks I can actually do this)

Sticky Notes…Ugh!

Great another “sticky note” strategically placed in the middle of my computer screen.  Yes, the gentle reminder to keep me on track.  Perhaps if I had pretended to accomplish something yesterday (other than shopping) I wouldn’t be greeted by the lovely little yellow note today.

Who invented this stupid “sticky note” program for the computer anyway.  I hate it but my husband seems to think it is the best thing since sliced bread.  Really there is nothing I hate more  than sitting down at my computer and finding yet another little reminder of all the things I need to do.  Haha, got you today.  Instead of doing it you inspired me to write a blog post.  I suppose I should thank you then.  Next time could you at least stick something like, drink coffee, make the bed, shower on the list so I can get some satisfaction out of crossing at least one or two things off the list.

If I delete the “sticky note” do you think it will make all these things go away.  Now that would be a cool invention.  Find me someone who can write a computer program that completes my to do list and I’ll be a happy woman (and they would be a happy, rich person)  Maybe that is what I should be doing with my extra time.   Wait, I don’t actually have extra time, I’m just wasting the time I have.

Now I’m stressed out.  I have all these things to do and I have no idea how I will find the time to do it.  I’m just going to have to go have a coffee and take some time to relax and decompress now.

Did I mention I hate “sticky notes?”