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Your Lucky Ticket

The house is quiet again.  The morning rush hour is over, the kids are safely (I hope) settled into school and my husband is tucked neatly behind his office desk.  Oh yes the joy of being a stay at home mom.  I am so “lucky” I can just sit around and do nothing for the rest of the day and wait for everyone to come back at the end of their day.  In the meantime what should I do?  Perhaps drive around town in my new Lexus, get my hair and nails done at the salon, buy a new outfit, book the family vacation, and lunch with the girls.  NOT!

I can’t count how many times I have heard “you are so lucky to be able to stay home.”  I want to scream in reply that it isn’t luck that has allowed me to stay at home.  I CHOSE to give up my career to raise our children, I didn’t win the stay at home lottery.  With that choice came a great deal of sacrifice.

However, if you continue to believe it is a matter of luck let me give you your ticket for the STAY-AT-HOME-MOM lottery.  Good luck!

 lottery

 

 Please don’t get me wrong, I am happy with the choices I have made.  I wouldn’t exchange my time with my kids for any amount of money but it wasn’t always easy.  Through our sacrifices my husband and I have been able to carve out a comfortable life for our family and we now have some of those extras that we once had to forgo.  All I ask is that instead of looking at me and saying “wow you are lucky” look at me and say “wow you’ve worked hard to raise your family.”  It is the same respect I give you when I admire your promotion or your ability to balance your career and family.

What we do in life is not about luck, it is a choice.

 

I’m Just Sitting Here Watching the Wheels Go Round and Round.

Photo by Brian Lane Winfield Moore

“I’m just sitting here watching the wheels go round and round.  I really love to watch them roll.”

SO much to do…yet here I sit doing nothing.

Why is it that when there is a lot to get accomplished I am struck with the desire to sit and think about the work rather than do it.  I know that once I get it done I will feel satisfied, relieved, proud, yet here I sit.  Perhaps I just don’t like feeling good.  Maybe I feel more alive when I am under pressure.  Who knows but right now it is just ticking me off and if I could reach I would give myself a good swift kick in the a**.

Maybe I should try one of those lists my husband is so fond of leaving around the house.  Much like the pieces of the dryer that are lying around the house in an attempt to fix it.  Yes that would be one of the jobs I need to do…buy a dryer.

Okay this is it, I am turning off my computer marching my butt out the door to buy the dryer, otherwise my children are going to school in dirty clothes tomorrow (now there is motivation, a thirteen year old daughter without clothes).  When that is done it’s laundry, weeding, mulching, studying, closets, bills, basement, garage…who am I kidding let’s just start with buying a dryer.

Please tell me I am not the only one that gets stuck in these ruts.  Maybe it’s the whole back to school thing!

I’m Not Super-Woman

The water is calling me to come and play!

Apparently I am not super woman.  I cannot actually do and be everything.  It came to me as somewhat of a surprise and I must admit, a slight disappointment, but I believe I am coming to terms with it now. Sometimes you just have to let something go in order to get done what truly needs to get done, hence the silence on the blog front for the past little while.

I think it is maturity and the aging process that has finally taught me that it is okay to admit that you can’t do it all.  I look back on my early years as a mom and wife and wonder what I was thinking.  Apparently the word “NO” was only in my children’s vocabulary.  Now as I am older I do not feel any guilt when I say “no I can’t do that.”  I feel no shame to admit that at times I am overwhelmed by the tasks around me and I just need to stop and rest for a while either mentally or physically, while I regroup.  As a matter of fact I feel a great sense of pride in being truly honest with myself.

Now that I have the family settled back into the house at the lake for the summer I look forward to finding a routine that includes my “me time.”  Time to blog, time to read, time to paint or just time to sit and be quiet (okay, quiet will have to come before everyone else wakes up).

So this is me, just me and not some imaginary super woman, back again after a month of complete chaos ready to enjoy the summer.   So what should I do today?  The water is looking at me as calm as I have ever seen it.  I believe it is inviting me to come and play.  Maybe today will be the day I finally conquer the wake board.  Yes, I think that I am feeling pretty lucky today… the wake board it is.

So maybe I still like to imagine I am super woman just a little.  I’ll let you know how that works for me a little later.

I’ll Take Another

Coffee that is.  I’ll take another coffee.  I hate Monday mornings.  Especially when it is dark and dreary.

The dishwasher is looking at me wondering when I am going to empty it. The washing machine is getting impatient waiting for the first of many loads to get started.  My running shoes are sitting at the door in hopes of a brisk morning walk.  My text books are curious as to whether or not they will be cracked open today.

My familiar friends are waiting with anticipation to see which one I will choose to tackle first today.  You will have to wait a little longer my friends.  As for now…I’ll take another coffee instead.

Why does the thought of having another coffee instead of tackling the daily chores of a stay at home mom make me feel guilty.  I hate that I feel like I have to be “doing” something all the time.  I am not entitled to just sit and relax.  It is that whole stereotype of the stay at home mom eating bon-bons and watching Soap Opera’s that I am  fighting.

I’ve been doing this stay at home thing for almost eight-teen years, minus the last attempt to go back to work before “the move.”  It is just now that I have given myself permission to wear sweats, a pony tail and no make-up if I feel like it.  Up to this point it has been “proper attire”, full make-up and hair fully styled.

Why do stay-at-home mom’s feel the need to justify what we do with our time? (Or is it just me?)  It is an honorable job with little reward and no real recognition.  I need to stop apologizing for what I do and if I want to have another cup of coffee, so be it.  After all I can’t clock out at 4:00 and claim that my job is done for the day.

Keeping Perspective

GO

Living life is like juggling balls.

I read this in a book, I would love to tell you which one but just can’t remember.  The book didn’t stick with me but the analogy did.

Each aspect of you life is a ball.

  • Health
  • Family
  • Job
  • Money

Now look at the list and realize that some of these balls are glass while others are rubber.  Health, and family are glass.  If you drop them they will shatter.  Job and money are rubber.  If you drop them they will bounce back.

When you are juggling your life remember which balls you need to prioritize.

STOP

Thanks to Gypsy Mamma Blog for another inspirational Five Minute Friday. This week’s topic is “perspective”  Please stop by her site and join in the fun.

The Gypsy Mama’s Blog

Don’t Mean to Burst Your Bubble.

I love it when someone’s stupidity provides you with the perfect blogging moment.

Unfortunately that someone has been my husband far too much lately.  Sorry honey I really love you and this isn’t supposed to be a husband bashing blog but really…you open the door, you walk in!

The week-end is here once again and like always we are trying to balance the multitude of tasks that need to be done in the household.  Final decisions needed to be made last night about whether or not we could make it to Canada for the week-end to put the docks in the lake.  The problem is we had already planned a dinner party for Sunday.  When my husband suggested that we could make it up to the lake it was my assumption he had cancelled the dinner party.

Hubby’s Week-end Plan:

  • Friday 1:00 pm – leave for the lake
  • Friday 7:00 pm – arrive at the lake
  • Saturday – put the docks in the lake and visit with relatives
  • Sunday 9:00am – leave the lake
  • Sunday 3:00 pm – arrive home
  • Sunday 4:00pm – host a dinner party

Hello???  I don’t mean to burst your bubble but I really am not super woman.

I’m not super man

Question: when will we get the groceries?

Answer: you can do that Friday morning before we leave.

Question:  When will I clean the house?

Answer:  The house is fine, just whip through with the vacuum when we get home.

Question:  When will we cook?

Answer:  I’ll just through the meat on the grill.

Question: What about the rest of the meal?

Answer:  That won’t take you long, you can do it.

No really I can’t do it!  But thank-you for the perfect blog!

Guess what I’m doing this week-end…staying home, cleaning and cooking.  Then relaxing with a wonderful dinner party.

Doin’ The Happy Dance

Oh ya, I’m doing a happy dance!  Not a pretty sight but I don’t really care.

Just finished My Anatomy and Physiology class.  Medical Terminology.. done, Anatomy and Physiology.. done…Medical Coding here I come!

Okay so it wasn’t a super hard challenge considering I already have a degree in Nursing Science and taught Anatomy and Physiology for a couple semesters, but still, it is a lot different being on the other side of the exams.  Not to mention the pressure from the kids.  Oh ya, they just love to get back at me.  You know the saying “What’s good for the goose is good for the gander.”  Apparently I am the gander.  “Why did you get one wrong?  Didn’t you study?  An A is only good if you put your full effort into it”.  I have never spent more time eating my own words!

As a reward for my accomplishments I think a little shopping is in order as well as a slight detour from the diet.  What better way to celebrate than a new pair of shoes, an iced latte (with whipping cream), and a giant brownie.

Dance on Mamma, dance on!

One Woman’s Addiction

My name is Sandra and I am addicted to the Food Network.

Yes it is hard to admit but it is time to be honest about my problems and perhaps by talking about it I can finally get help.

Dinners, Drive-Ins and Dives, Cupcake Wars, Sweet Genius,  Chopped, Iron Chef, Mexican Made Easy, the list goes on and on.  I dream about Bobby Flay, Emeril Lagasse, and Jamie Oliver.  I just can’t help it.  I can’t get enough of the food network.

by Nick Nguyen

My problem goes even deeper.  Cook books…I can’t stop buying cookbooks.  I can’t help myself they call my name and beg me to buy them.  I stand in line at the check out trying to keep my eyes forward, begging them not to look sideways.  I know if I just glance at the magazines there is going to be a recipe on the cover that I’m not going to be able to live without.  My life will not be complete if I don’t have that magazine, that recipe.

This is a sampling of what I own

The irony is that I don’t even cook.  Well I cook, I just don’t cook well.  It’s the basics for my family.  Roast chicken, roast beef, grilled steak, spaghetti, you get the idea.   Definitely nothing that requires the in-depth studies of the food network or the use of one-hundred recipe books.  I want to cook better, I want to try the recipes, I just don’t.

As for why I don’t use what I learn on the Food Network, it’s an easy explanation…I can never remember what it was that I wanted to make after watching the show.  It is just one of those side effects of  the age and the fact that I’ve watched four episodes in one sitting and they all seem to blend together in the end.  The recipe books are the same.  I’ve bought so many I can’t remember which one has the recipe I wanted to try.  Basically I have overwhelmed myself to the point of not functioning.

So please help me.  I am Sandra and I am addicted to the Food Network (and cook books)

If you have any good recipes for a simple want-to-be chef please leave them here.  I promise, if you do, I will actually try to cook it.  I’ll even blog my results.

He’s From Somewhere Further Than Mars

Mars is much to close to Venus for my husband to be from there.  He is from an entirely different Galaxy.

By Raven Vasquez

I happened to remind him that it was mothers day this weekend and kindly inquired if we had any “special” plans for the weekend.  Wow did he come up with some great ones!

  • It’s supposed to be nice we could work in the yard.  You could put the flowers in the side garden if you want”  Oh ya that’s just what I want, to bust my a** in the garden for Mother’s Day.
  • While you’re at the grocery store why don’t you pick up some steaks I can grill.”  Obviously we are not going out for dinner.  Grilling steaks is code for “I’ll sit on the deck with the dog doing a Sudoku puzzle while you cut up the vegetables, make the salad, boil the potatoes and clean up the mess.”
  • Did the kids want to have any friends over this week-end?”  Perfect not only can I look after my kids but I can have the neighborhood kids too so their mom’s can have a quiet relaxing day reading a book.

This was not going in the direction I had hoped so I thought maybe I should help him along.

  • What do you think about picking up a patio set this weekend for the deck?”  His response: “I don’t need one, what we have is good enough.”  When did I mention him in that statement.  It was me I was thinking of and no I don’t NEED it either. However,  it would be nice to have a table so I didn’t have to eat of my lap all the time.

This is when I realized that my husband is an Alien from another galaxy.  He just doesn’t understand women.  (But I love him just the same)

I love him anyway

Please make me jealous and tell me what wonderful surprises your family has in store for you this weekend.  Perhaps I can live vicariously through you!

Mommy Brag Time

Sorry, but I just have to brag, it’s what we mommies do.

Just got a text from my son who is a senior in high school.  He wanted to share with me that he was just asked to give the Valedictorian Address at his graduation.  The honor is given to the student who is ranked number one in the graduating class.  He has been ranked number one since his freshman year and has worked like a dog to keep the rank.  I am soooooo proud of him.

I can guarantee you this is going to be one mom who will need an extra-large box of Kleenex’s and waterproof mascara at graduation.

Oh my gosh I just realized I am blogging about my son’s graduation.  That is impossible, it can not be that I am really old enough and more importantly he is old enough to be graduating high school.  I think this is one of Oprah’s Ah Ha moments she talks about but I don’t think I like it.  Suddenly I don’t feel ready for him to grow up and go away.  I have spent the past year helping with the college applications, scholarship applications, getting his room in residence, it’s been all business and very hectic.  Until now I don’t think I actually processed what it meant…MY BABY IS ALL GROWN UP!  Maybe I better get the Kleenex’s now.

Congratulations son, you did it.  We never made it easy for you moving so often.  You had already been in four different school systems in three states and two countries before you finished elementary school.  We announced that yet another move was occurring for your senior year.  You showed your maturity and focus when we let you stay behind and finish your senior year without our guidance.  Not only did you do it, but you managed to stay at the top of your class.  You are an amazing young man and I am very proud to be your mom.

My Baby is All Grown Up