The Curse

by Andy Welsher, Creative Commons

“Tell dad he can’t retire before I graduate high school, that would be embarrassing.”

This is the grand statement my thirteen year old daughter made the other day at the dinner table.  I looked at her with complete confusion, a reaction that has become somewhat normal lately, and asked her where the heck that came from.

“You and dad are like the oldest parents in the school.”

Let me clarify something here.  I am turning 45 this month and my husband is 47.  Not extremely old for being the parents of a thirteen year old not to mention we have a fifteen and eighteen year old.

The only thing I can figure out is that we must have moved to a community that has a serious issue with teen pregnancy, no one in her school is the youngest in their family or no one is this community went to college, got a degree and began a career before they had children.

“Well just relax dad isn’t going to retire before you finish high school, as a matter of fact he will have to work until you finish college if we want to pay for it.  Feel free to start paying for our seniors home once you finish college though.  Obviously we will be too old to look after ourselves by then.”

I marvel at these people who say their children make them feel young.  Maybe they would like to borrow my daughter for a few days.  She can quickly provide them with a reality check.  After a few days with her you will know you are old and for free she will provide you with a few basic rules on aging:

  • Grey hair is not attractive
  • You may not wear any shirt that has the logo of  a “young person’s store”on it
  • Sexy is always inappropriate
  • Never try to dance
  • Don’t sing to the radio
  • You are not funny

Don’t worry my dear daughter, I have put the mother’s curse on you.  The same curse my mom put on me and hers on her.  It is the curse that has been passed on from mother to daughter since the beginning of time:

“I hope your daughter is just like you!”

Have you put the curse on your children yet?  Did your mom put the curse on you?  I know my mom did because I see it in my daughter and my nieces.  All I can say now is “SORRY MOM, I GET IT NOW!”

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2 thoughts on “The Curse

  1. Neither I nor my husband have been told we are too old. And I keep encouraging them to live their life before marriage and children. I think my case is helped when their friends have parents more or less the same age as me 🙂

    • That was the case before this recent move. Apparently it is a different demographic here. She says “no offense intended just a fact” She cracks me up!

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